How I Met My Killer
by Alpha19
Summary: How I Met Your Mother meets Scream. First proper fanfiction, so please read and review.
1. How It Started

**I do not own "How I met your mother". Also read and review. This story has not been planned out at all so feel free to suggest ideas. This is also AU so I'm not exactly sure when this takes place.**

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It was a normal Saturday afternoon when everything got fucked up.

Lily had put Marvin down for a nap in the nursery room about an hour ago and had settled on the couch to watch some cheesy romcom film that Marshall had picked since he was finishing a big project at work about something or another. The film had just started getting good when the phone started to ring.

"Shit" Lily muttered to herself as she hurried to the phone before the ringing woke up Marvin while muting the film. "Hello" Lily said into the phone, brushing her hair away from her ear.

"Hello Lily" came the reply of a slightly chilling and unknown voice.

"Hello, who is this?"

"That's not important" laughed the voice on the other side of the phone "But don't you think Marvin's been a little too quiet for a while?"

Lily bit her lip turning to the baby monitor on the wall which she realized had made no noise since Marvin had been put down for his nap. "Is this you Barney" she asked worriedly as she hurried to the nursery room door. Lily reached for the door only to find it firmly locked from the other side, "Barney, open the door, this is not funny!" Lily screamed into the phone.

"This isn't Barney" the voice replied, suddenly serious. Lily's mobile started ringing from her handbag in the kitchen. "Barney this is not funny anymore" Lily said as she hurried to the kitchen to fish her phone out of her handbag. Lily took a breath when she saw the caller I.D said Barney, "Hel... Hello?" Lily said into her mobile.

"Hey, Lil" Barney's reply came from the mobile "Is Marshall still in bed, I needed to ask if he wa-"

"He's at work, look, can you ring him and tell him to get here now! Someone's on the phone and they're freaking me out" Lily screamed into the phone, now close to bursting into tears.

"I... Yeah I'll get right on it... Are you OK? Do you want me to-"

"Please just call Marshall now" Lily said before hanging up her mobile and cramming it into her pocket. Quickly returning to the phone, Lily screamed into it "Who the fuck are you and what do you want from me" while trying to suppress the tears that were close to escaping.

The voice at the end of the phone laughed "Do you really think you should be talking like that near Marvin?". The voice paused for a moment before bursting out in hysterical laughter "Although it's not like he can hear you anymore" the voice laughed before hanging up.

"Shit" Lily muttered to herself, confused and advancing to the nursery door while raising the phone like a club. Lily took a deep breath before throwing the door open, dropping the phone instantly. The tears that had been so close to falling now flowed freely at the sight before her.

Hanging from the ceiling by his intestines was Marvin his body facing away from the door, his face expressionless, his neck slit open causing his head to hang upside down staring at Lily.

"NO! NO, FUCK NO!" Lily screamed, pounding the floor.

It was only a minute later when Marshall and Barney walked through the door to find Lily sobbing on the floor before seeing the horror before them.

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**To be continued... Anyway like I said feel free to point out all errors you see, suggest any ideas and review. Also this is my first HIMYM fanfic and my first non-slash fic so characters may be a little OOC and chances are the story will be quite dialogue based.**


	2. Moving Out

**Finally decided to update this, even though nobody bothered to review -_-. Anyway I don't own HIMYM or make any money from this. All chapters will now be Ted's POV, except the ones that aren't.**

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**Ted's POV**

"OK guys." I announced to my class "Today we will be studying bridges in America." As I began to click my laptop to show the next slide on the powerpoint, I heard the door at the other end of the room open and turned my head slightly to yell, "You know if you're going to be late, you shouldn't sho-"

"Shut up Ted" I heard Robin yell "Lily called me, we need to get to Marshall and Lily's place"

"I can't just up and leave my class, they need me"

Robin bit her lip, obviously having an internal battle with herself before running to me and whispering "Lily called me, Marvin's been killed." I blinked repeatedly to myself processing several thoughts _"Marvin's dead?" "When?" "Killed?"_

"Class dismissed" I yelled hysterically at my class, who were now attempting to eavesdrop. "Lets go" I said to Robin, practically dragging her out the room.

_Less than five minutes later_

"So what did Lily tell you?" I asked Robin while waiting for a cab to get nearby.

Robin gave a sigh before answering, "She just said Marvin had been murdered and she wanted everyone to get to MacLaren's so we could all talk"

"Murdered? Did she say who it was? When did it happen? How was he killed?" I asked the flurry of questions that had been in my mind the last few minutes.

"All she told me is some sicko was on the phone and then she found Marvin hanging by ... There's a cab!" She sprinted to the side of the pavement and stuck her hand out until the cab pulled over.

_One cab ride later_

Robin and I hurried into MacLaren's and ran to our usual booth and saw Barney comforting a sobbing Lily with Marshall opposite her. Robin sat next to Marshall and I sat on the outside seat.

"So... what happened?" I asked Lily. Lily simply shook her head in response and looked at Barney."No problem Lil" Barney said as he rubbed Lily's back soothingly "OK, so I called Lily, since I needed to ask if Marshall still wanted to go out with me next week but it turned out he was at work. Anyway, Lil told me that somebody was freaking her out over the phone and asked me to call Marshall. So I called him and told him what I knew so I picked him up in a cab and we came here and when we got here Marvin was ... dead" Barney ended sobbing slightly at the end.

I nodded in slight understanding. "So what are we going to do now?" I asked everybody.

It was Barney who replied after looking at everyone "You guys can move in with me if you want? And Robin already said Lily can move into her place".

Marshall spoke for the first time since I got here "This is fucked up. You guys help me move our stuff if we have to leave?"

"Sure" Barney and I replied in unison getting up to help.


	3. When He Comes Back

**Hoping for at least one proper review before I start Chapter 4.**

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**Lily's POV**

I threw the door open expecting my worst nightmare but my worst nightmare would have been better than what I saw. Marvin hanging dead from the ceiling by his intestines, a puddle of dried blood on the floor beneath him. Then he gave his intestines a sharp tug causing his body to fall to the ground before clambering unsteadily to his feet, repeating "Join me. Join me Mummy!" before he leaped on to my face.

I woke up with a scream my body drenched with sweat. It had been two weeks since I found Marvin murdered, two weeks since I moved in to Robin's place and two weeks since the nightmares had started.

"Shit" I mumbled to myself, looking at the alarm clock next to my bed which read 3:23. "Shit. I need to pee." I climbed out of bed as quietly as I could and sneaked to the bathroom and did my business. As I left the bathroom I heard a creak coming from the kitchen and tried to silently creep there. I took a deep breath to calm myself before opening the kitchen door slightly and peering in. I screamed as I saw the figure just beyond the door, dressed in all black with a tight mask, gripping a knife who was now advancing towards me.

"Robin!" I screamed as I ran back my room. "Robin he's here!" I screamed again slamming the bedroom door behind me, hoping if I made enough noise Robin might wake up. I tore open the bedside cabinet and rummaged around for the gun Robin had given me and taught me how to use. "OK, aim." I said to myself aiming at the closed door and taking a deep breath, "Pull back the safety thing." As the man tore through the bedroom door I pulled the gun trigger and waited for the deafening bang from the gun. Instead all I heard was a small empty clicking noise. "Shit. Shit! SHIT!" I yelled, pulling the trigger repeatedly. I did the only thing I could think to do and raised the gun and brought it down on the masked man's head before kicking him squarely in the stomach. I took a deep breath, pushing all logic out of my mind before sprinting towards the man, tackling him to the ground and wrestling the knife out of his hands and bringing it down above his calf. The mask muffled the grunt that escaped the man's lips before he punched me in the side of the head and proceeded to run out of the room and into Robin's room as I followed closely. Just as I was about to slam the knife into the back of the man's he ran into Robin's room and locked the door.

"Robin he's in there with you" I screamed, pounding on the door. I heard the window in Robin's room shatter before Robin sprinted out of the room clutching her hand which was trickling with blood.

"Lil, I'm so sorry." Robin said looking around for something to bandage her hand, "I heard my door open and the guy just smashed my window and I tried to grab him but hit the window instead." She said raising her hand to show me the deep cut that ran down her palm.

"Don't worry about it." I said pulling her into a big hug. "Lets wrap it in a towel or something and we can talk to the guys later."

"OK" Robin said giving a small sigh of relief. "I'm gonna text the guys and tell them to meet us at the bar in the morning.

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**Anyway please read and review and suggest stuff etc.  
**


	4. Back At The Bar

**Big thank you to I'mBiWinning who was the first person to review, follow and fav this story**

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**Ted's POV**

Barney, Marshall and I were sitting at our usual booth in silence waiting for Lily and Robin to arrive after finding out earlier in the morning that the killer had been at been at Robin's place and had attacked Lily before running off. It was Marshall who eventually broke the silence "Where are they? They said they would be here at 8, what time is it?" Barney pulled out his phone and glanced at it.

"Dude, relax it's only 8:05 they probably just got caught in traffic or something." Barney said in a soothing voice to Marshall.

"But what if the killer came back and did something, do you think I should call" Marshall said becoming more hysterical as he talked. I glanced at the door as Lily walked in with Robin limping slightly behind her.

"Guys, they're both here." I said as I stood up letting Lily sit next to Marshall and kiss him on the cheek as Robin sat next to Barney. "So what happened this morning then." I said finally being able to ask them both the question that had been on my mind since Marshall had got the text from Robin explaining a bit of what happened.

Lily replied "I heard a noise at about half three and went to see what it was. The noise was in the kitchen so I went there and when I opened it up the killer was there so I went back to my room to get the gun Robin gave me but it wouldn't fire. Since it wouldn't fire I just tackled the guy and stabbed him in his leg. Then the wimp ran in to Robin's room and got out through the window." She finished.

"Have you tried calling the police?" Barney asked trying to rub Robin's leg although she kept slapping his hand away.

It was Robin who answered "We tried but they just said they couldn't do much from knowing it was a guy in black and said we should call again if we found out anything else."

I asked another question that popped in my head "So are you going to move houses again?" I asked to both Robin and Lily, "Since the killer can get in your apartment."

Lily blinked in confusion before looking at Robin and replying sadly "Yeah I guess we are."

Everybody was silent for a few moments before Barney said "Great, more people living with me."

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**Feel free to review. Also I've now officially decided who the killer is although there may be more than one killer anyway.**


	5. Who Could It Be?

** J - I was starting to wonder if people were picking up on those clues. Feel free to review who you think the killer is so far?**

** I'mBiWinning - I needed to do a non-action chapter to set a few things up for later chapters although this is also a non-action chapter.**

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**Ted's POV**

It had been a day since Lil and Robin moved in with everybody else at Barney's place. Marshall was shoveling ice cream into his mouth while complaining angrily to Robin and I about how useless the police were being. "All I'm saying is they should have done something" Marshall began another rant in between mouthfuls of his ice cream "Is that the police should have at least interviewed us or something."

"To be fair, you didn't exactly give them much to go on." I tried to reason with him, "If you really want to help them we need to think of everybody that has a grudge against Lily".

"Shit" Robin yelled suddenly causing everyone to look at her in alarm. "I, erm, lost track of time! I gotta go to work so I'll see you all later!" She yelled running out the apartment closing the door behind her.

"We need to figure out who it could be." I repeated to Marshall. "Hey guys! Get in here!" I yelled into the kitchen at Barney and Lily who immediately came into the living room.

"What do you want Ted?" Lily asked as she sat down next to Marshall on the couch. I took a breathe as I decided how to phrase my question.

"Who do you think would do all this stuff to you?" I asked finally settling on bluntness over tact.

Lily bit her lip trying to think of anybody that would do this trying to ignore the growing urge to break down in hysterics. "Well, it could be Mrs Park from the coffee shop since I did kinda say I didn't care about her dead husband."

Marshall said "Can't be her, I'm pretty sure the shop closed because she died last year."

Lily gave a sigh before thinking again, "It could be Gasser, I'd be pretty pissed still if somebody got me bullied out of school."

Barney joined the conversation and yelled from the kitchen, "Did you know he works as a cleaner at The Golden Oldies now? I saw one time when I was trying new strip clubs out."

"So it could be him then." Lily stated, "Who do you think it could be then?" Lily asked me.

I gave a small sigh, "I think it could be Robin." I said as everybody stared at me in stunned silence.

"What the hell Mosby!" Lily screamed at me causing me to instinctively flinch back "Why would one of my best friends try to kill me?"

"I'm not saying she did it but some of the evidence does point to her." I tried to reason.

"Like what?" Lily yelled back at me not seeing the reasons I had yet.

"Well, how else would the killer be able to get in Robin's apartment without breaking in? And Robin was the one who gave you a gun that wouldn't fire. And you said that you stabbed the killer in the leg and yesterday in the bar Robin was limping. And yesterday every time Barney tried to calm down Robin or stroke her leg she just slapped his hand" I stated hoping some of my points were at least making sense in everyone's heads. "I'm not saying it's her and I really hope that it isn't her but to much is making me think it's her."

"No!" Lily screamed, refusing to think about anything I said. "I will not believe that Robin is the person who killed Marvin or tried to kill me!"

"Just think about anybody else who it could be then." I said as I turned to Marshall who I could tell was slowly coming round the points I raised. "Marshall, who do you think it is?"

Marshall was silent before looking down and replying sadly "Right now I think it could be anybody." He looked around with suspicion, "But maybe we should wait for Robin before we do anything rash."

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**Feel free to review and say who you think the killer is. The next review will be up next Saturday by the earliest thanks to my broken internet connection.  
**


	6. When five become four

_The next day at 18:35_

**Teds POV**

"Guys I'm off to work now, I'll see you when I finish." Yelled Robin from the bedroom she had recently started sharing with Barney in his apartment. As everybody mumbled responses to this I nodded at Marshall and headed towards the kitchen. "You ready?" I whispered to Marshall as soon as he entered the kitchen.

Marshall glanced back at the living room where Barney and Lily were sitting on the couch muttering to each other. "I don't know dude, isn't looking through Robin's room a bit immoral? And I keep feeling bad hiding this from Lily." He said shaking his head slightly.

"All we have to do is look through her room and see if we can find anything out of the ordinary. And you know if we told Lily she'd stop us."

Marshall sighed before glancing back at the living room where Barney and Lily were distracted talking to each other "OK, lets do it now." I nodded and began quietly walking towards Robin's bedroom with Marshall behind me. As we got the the bedroom we looked around for anything that could be Robins or that looked out of the ordinary. It took ten minutes of searching until either of us said or found anything until Marshall cried out "Shit! Ted look at this now!". I rushed over to Robin's side of the bed where Marshall was pulling out a suitcase. I took a breath and opened the suitcase that Marshall had already looked at. "Shit." I said to myself looking in the suitcase which contained a black outfit and three knives, one of which was covered in blood. "We need to tell them, don't we?" I asked Marshall nodding towards the living room.

"Yeah, come on." He replied getting up and heading to the living room dragging the suitcase behind him. "Guys!" He announced causing Barney and Lily to look at him with curiosity. "Ted and I looked in Robin's room to see if we could find anyth-"

"You did what?!" Lily yelled, standing up and heading towards me and Marshall. "Do you know how wrong and immoral that is? As soon as Robin gets here I am tell-" Lily's shouted rant was suddenly interrupted by an urgent knocking at the door. "That's probably Robin now" Lily yelled "Barney get the door and we'll explain this to her!". Barney nodded and walked to the door, opening it and exclaiming "Shit! Run!" as he tried to slam the door close before the figure threw the door open causing Barney to stumble backwards and fall onto the floor. The figure slammed the door shut before advancing towards Barney. I looked at Marshall before nodding and charging at the figure I thought was Robin and tackling her to the floor as Marshall helped me pin her down.

"Marshall, search her for weapons and keep her down!" I ordered "Barney you ca-" My order was interrupted by another urgent knocking at the door. "Guys!" Robin's voice came from behind the door "I left my phone in my bedroom, open the door so I can get it." I looked in confusion at the door where Robin was behind and at the figure I was convinced was Robin. I opened the door and looked at Robin as Barney took my place at pinning the figure down. "Robin, Lily get in the bedroom now!" I yelled. The figure suddenly began to struggle against Barney and Marshall before managing to throw both of them up, standing up and pulling out a cleaver.

Lily, Robin and I quickly ran into the bedroom and waited for the noises to stop. After five minutes of loud thumps, screams and shatters before Marshall cried out "Call a fucking ambulance!" We all glanced at each other and ran out of the room just in time to see the figure sprint out of the apartment before we noticed Barney lying on the floor. Barney had a series of slashes on his chest and one long gash across his throat which were all bleeding creating a large puddle of blood on the floor. It took a second for me to tear my eyes away from his body and look at his face where his eyes were rolled back into his sockets, fully devoid of life. "Fuck." I sobbed to myself taking out my mobile and phoning the police and sobbing into it "I think we have a dead body."

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**Read, review etc.**


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